Chemistry of Relationships

This is written during the end of my LOOO......ONG summer holidays when I'm sitting here without doing the project work I'm supposed to do...this shall be my last write up about Chemistry I have " tried" to learn so far and I have made up my mind to forget it after writing this...

Disclaimer : This might seem very uninteresting for most of the people..so far I have been writing posts for the sake of blogging...but this is something that I have realized myself in the recent days and may not suit some of the personalities reading this blog....I just wanted to write and so I'm writing

In my 6th standard one of my teacher told about praying to God in a circular fashion. That is ..where you first pray for yourself (self centered concentric circles...) , then for your dear ones say parents, siblings, dear friends, friends, people whom you are acquainted with..and for your enemies (positive or negative depends on the person...:P )... The circle expands ... just like the ripples formed on a water surface originated by a falling drop expands.... No...If you think I'm going to say something regarding God you are mistaken...and of course the title does not suggest that too...

What is obvious from this circle is the closer a person to you, the smaller the circle he/she is in. The smaller the circle he/she is in....the more the priority you give to that particular person. Person treated by you in a particular same way shall be in a particular circle. The virtual distance between you and the person shall be the radius of the circle the person is.

I do not intend to make 'Mokka'...but you might feel this comparison of the above mentioned circle with the structure of an atom is... :

Consider yourself as the nucleus of the atom and all other persons as electrons around you. Sticking to the classical Bohr's model, the circle represents the electron orbits. Transitions happen often..but in the case of relationships there is no quantisation. The transition might be continuous or discrete. But the atom has to spend some of its energy for it ..it might be some thing as simple as a smile or a talk or as valuable as your time and heart...

Consider now the other person being the nucleus in his own set of concentric circles. The relationship between these two persons can be considered as the chemical bond that forms between the two atoms. The criterion for bond -relationship formation is that one person should be in the circle of the other and vice versa.

Quantum chemistry says a strong bond is formed when the electron in one energy jumps into the orbital of the other atom of same energy level. That was the reason told for the order of strength of back-bonding among halogens. Dissimilar energy levels do not form the strongest possible bond. In binary language of molecular orbital theory , bonding is formed if orbitals of same sign overlap...dissimilar orbital overlap causes repulsion. Stability is present in case of similarity Isn't it interesting to find that the same holds true for relationships also ?

Whatever might be the relationship between you and the other , it will last long only if both of you are in the circles of the other with same radius. The person may be your close friend or just a 'Hi-Bye' friend. This is the important lesson I have learnt : When the persons are in circles of different radius, then one will expect more from the other and the other will not live upto his/her expectations. This will cause the relationship to break. It is better not to be close than breaking a close relationship, right ?. So keep persons at a distance in which they keep you at. Any discrepancy in this will cause problems in the relationship.

Some of the circles might accomodate any number of people ...say the number of friends we have, keeps on increasing and they get accomodated either in any of the existing circles or create a new one of their own. But as this happens there is a chance of that circle getting expanded which means all the persons in that circle get farther away from you..:(... But there might be some relation that will always remain close to you ...consistently...unshakably...a relationship which belonged to a circle, where it remained as one among the many to the one which is the smallest of all..staying unique throughout both of their lives...people call this relationship as LOVE.

Just like there is lot of electronic repulsion in the compact sized 2p orbital of the Fluorine atom, this circle is even more smaller to adopt two persons at the same time. One person being in that circle forces out any other person entering into that circle. This interelectron repulsion is called as POSSESIVENESS by non-technical people. Before I forget I want you to remind you that F-F bond is stronger than any other F-X bond. This is again because both the persons treat the other in the same way and very closely. The common name for F-X bond is one -sided love.

Here every atom is a radio-active one. Anyone might get disintegrated anytime. Some live long...some don't. But as long as one lives, live with proper configuration. That is what I wanted to say..no.. think of. External influences never matter some of the internal properties like the radioactivity. So unless you realise this from the bottom of your heart, this won't make sense no matter what I say.